I just love

How I help you with everything and all you do is throw more shit it me. (: NOT I've been here for you, & all you do is throw all your problems at me. I love you, but i hate how you always tell me stuff like I'm not supposed to be doing it. And after that, you say you love me and that I'm always there for you and you'll be there for me, but you being there for me isn't ALL that true. I'm not gonna be your scratching post anymore. Find someone else to give all your problems to and bitch at. It's not that i don't want to hear about your problems, but that you do things that make me feel.. left out. Sick & tired of this, yet i still love you very much.

Jaunary 22.

Suppose to be good throughout the whole day, but the beginning of the day sucked like a bitch. I almost didn't have a ride to school, but Helena's mommy brought me. I left my binder at home so i didn't have half of my homework. or my ID card, or my note, or my money. -_- Towards the end of the day was good. TACO BELLL!(= haha, cutie ily. &Went to the game! Didn't cwalk with Amy cause cause cause straw buddy wasn't there! His mom got mad cause he didn't buy his tree pipfty straws. BUT IT'S OKAY (= Cheeled with Adrianna, Amy, Alyssa, Martha, Angela, Shaela, Andrew, ELLER!, Barry, William, Louie, Leyva people, and others. (= Barry's mean. &I finally got to see BEAUTIFUL!, Teejay & Nathan. LOL, all you balllers are cool, even if you don't know how to tie shoes! (x But i lost a best friend, & made a new one :O I hate you Barry, )':

Memories.

Wherever i go, they just keep chasing me, telling me to come back. I miss everything, but changes happen, & I have to get used to them. Even if it's hard, I'll have to let some of these memories go. /= I miss all the hangouts. Yeah, my new schedule is okay, but i'm gonna miss THY in first period & JAMINE in second. ): But now i have first period with wife, Best Friend, & Alyssa! But wait, ew it's choir. Second period with sister!(: All of my day was okay/good, but the reminiscing of memories is giving me a strange feeling, yet, it's a good one. (=

Decisions, decisions.

I don't like having to choose over people, but it seems like I have to. It's not who asks first, or second. It's who i choose. And i don't intend on hurting anyone.. but it seems as if that might be how it's gonna go.

Friday- Shaela & Martha came over. Told Louie, Eller, & Andrew to come. But f/ckin` Eller fell asleep! LMFAO, then ANGELA came. Went to the park, took pictures :P Then Martha left, &Shaela & Angela slept over. Went downstairs! Ate, guitar hero, phone. (= Fun stuff. Then went to sleep at like 2.
Saturday- They woke up late so Barry had to wake up Angela, HAHA! &Then they got picked up. Did my chores & all that stuff. Then went to ADRIANNA'S Ate, made cookies, ate, drank soda, watched tv, went to grocery store, talked, TRIED to watch Unborn, but it didn't work. Talked a lot then went to sleep at like 1 or 2 :P
Sunday- Woke up at likeee, 9:45. Adrianna was already awake & didn't wake me, so yeah. We did the same stuff as the day before & ate PANCAKES WITH HELLA SUGAR & BUTTER. mmmm(: Changed, got ready, computer, talk talk talk. Got picked up at ONE! Went to Red Lobster, had more macaroni. Went to Eastridge, got stuffff. &Off to church later. I'm getting hella lazy with homework & projects. Caught up in drama. Trying to fix my own problems.

Happy 7 Months

Momma (: I miss you<3 In my room. Lights off. In my bed. Under the covers. Playing video games and eating hot pockets. Let's o=do that again (:


7 months means 4 more months til school ends. /=

Perfect equation.

Not. So much drama. My dad just left do San Diego. I might move there. My cousin is being the annoying b/tch she is. Austin is crying. I can't help Aaron with his science project. I can't understand my math homework. Guy problems x3. No, TIMES FIVEBILLION. Friend problems. I wasn't able to go to the mall cause they cancelled, but now they can?! -_- Friday next week, I'm not even SURE if it's safe to go. They hate him, she hates her, i hate her, he LIKES her. WTF. I can't handle this sh/t. Everyone's putting all the pressure on me & i don't know what to do or how to fix things anymore. I've been so focused on other peoples problems, and i haven't been solving mines. FORGET THIS. There isn't one night where i can sleep peacefully, and think about GOOD things. The ONLY GOOD THING GOING THROUGH MY MIND IS YOU. You're the only one who can clear things for me, but when i stop thinking about you, everything goes back to normal. Drama. OTHER peoples problems. People hating each other. Forget it forget it forget it.

Fakes.

Beezy.-I don't know why you could hurt her like that. You just took her heard and cut it into two. But that's okay, it's done with, and now you need to prove yourself a true friend to her. &If you don't you just completely 100% lied to me. Show her that you're a REAL friend to her, & not that you're a fake person. &Plus, WHY did you choose her? It's not just looks, but then again. That's not my choice, it's yours.

-Now that i think really hard about our relationship, and where it's gone, I can't help but want to go back into the past. I remember i used to cry myself to sleep cause of this. &I feel like we just stopped talking. Our conversations don't even last that long. Our hugs aren't as important as they used to be. Our hang outs are the same than before. I miss that. And if you think I replaced you, i never did. I never would. I would never be able to do that to you. I wanna go back. i wanna go back. I wanna go back. i wanna go back. i wanna go back.



):

Week one.

First 7days of ohnine started out pretty GAY. Drama drama drama. SOOO GAY. I can't wait until tomorrow, "SATURDAY" when helena gets to SINGGGG (: &Sunday: FAMILY DAY<3>It's not my first priority. &It's not up to me. Even though it's kinda bothering me &weighing me down. Grades, friends, no phone, guys, EVERYTHING. RAWR, gayness.