Break it off to you somehow

+Even if we fight a million times over little things, we could still make it better.

BUT, I think this is my final decision. Every time i see you, I want to break down and cry. Cheesy, but seriously. I can't stop thinking about this, but I'm trying to let it go. I'm dying inside, but I know this is what you want after all of the things I've put you through. Whatever you want is fine with me. I can't live without you, but hurting you isn't worth being your best friend, if i said that right. If hurting you is all I do, I'll stop it here. All of it. Even if I KNOW i can't live without you, this is for the better. I'm letting go, but just know my love is still there..

I know you don't need me, you seem fine flying solo. Maybe I had a somewhat 'secret crush' on you. Don't rightly know. You won't have to worry about me giving you anymore problems than I've already caused you to go through. Do i love you too much? I loved you more than you ever thought, keep that in mind.

If this leads me to crying every single night, it doesn't even matter. I know this is better for both of us, whether we want it or not. Whether I want it or not, I know that we'll do a lot better going our separate ways. I know, this is all my fault and i don't want it to be this way, but I realize that I'm not enough for you. I don't satisfy you as i should/the way you want me to. I'm sorry, with all my heart. And if you think I broke forever, no I didn't. That will always be there, friends or not.

*Third time around, honestly, hasn't hit me as hard as before. I guess i haven't been paying attention that much. Sorry for all the bullshit I've given you. I'll leave it all alone, but thanks for being there.

But don't worry, your secrets are all safe with me ♥ .

-I know you probably think that I'm being a completely self-centered bitch right now, and that's fine. I know I've been acting like one lately. It's okay, I know i deserve it.
100408.

Long Weekend

Saturday- Grandparents' 50th anniversary. Woke up at 10, showered, got ready. Took pictures at home then went to St. Francis. Took more pictures, saw Macaraegs. VINNIE AND LYRIK, the cutest. Mass at 1. Boring, booooring. Ma doesn't think Pa was hot. HAH. Saw cousins. I guess they didn't find their way in cause they didn't come into the church until like five minutes before it was over. Blunt. Took more pictures, sat around, bla. Mmm, then went home. Headed to the Marriott with Auntie, Julianna, Aaron, and Kristine. Stopped by McDonalds first. Saw Sydney and her 'special friend' sitting down at the hotel, so we talked in the Lounge Room with them. BLOCKED OFF JUST FOR US! HA, suckas. Then ate. GOOD FOOD. Cheese and Crackers, bread, lumpia, bacon and shrimp(i think)?, PUNCH! yum, and lots of other stuff. Then went up and down the elevators, pretty fun. These HS guys were freaking duuuumb. "What are you here for? Where's room 344? Do they have different towers?" WTF, how would we know. Ahah, so then told people to sign the guest book and get their cards. When everyone went into the ballroom, me, Aaron, Austin, Sydney, Josh, Vinnie, Lyrik, Christie, LennyBoy, Uncle Roy, Auntie Cathy, mom, dad, Uncle Norman, Auntie Myrla, Uncle Dino, gramma and grampa entered. Introduced us. Then sat down and ate MORE. Crab and mashed potatoes.. O_o. Then the Hiyas Filipino dancing. Then the slideshow. Good memories there (: Then second part of the Hiyas performance. Then Grandparents' speech, that took almost forever. Then the dancing. They played a lot of line dancing and old and Waltzing music, pretty boring. But then they played more upbeat music and me and the SJ Macs' formed a circle and started dancing and yeah. Mostly Aaron, Ricky, Christie and the parents though. Then they played Crank That and everyone sat down except for the Vallejo Cousins. HAHA. Then Cyclone and some weird music. They tried to get us to dance but none of us wanted to. SO. Yeah. Then took pictures, hung out outside of the ballroom. 'Oh, you guys are taking pictures in the mirror just like your Vallejo cousins'. HA, funny funnnnnnay. Aaron and Sydney and their two 'special friends' wanted to drink, but Christie didn't buy them. :P So sad. Waited for everyone to leave, just hung around. Then everyone left around 11 and we packed everything up and went home. Went straight to bed, I was soooo tired. Good day (: I missed the Macaraegs! I haven't seen them in foreverrrrr. Iloveyou all.(:

Sunday- Slept in. Woke up and took a shower. Then went downstairs and ate breakffast, looked at the pictures. Then talked about the party, and messed around. Then parents and Auntie Helen left for uh, Aaron's thingy, so me, Aaron, Austin, and Julianna snuck out to go to the swing, but people were there. So we kicked them off. Then ten minutes later some other kids came and kicked us off, so we just left. Went to the park then back 'cause Julianna was crying since we just ditched her. Woop. Went home, had Root Beer Floats, blasted music, and played Wii. Made more videos! Then started watching Twilight. I fell asleep towards the middle, woke up when parents came home. Started my homework, wrote my essay for track. I think :P Got ready for church. Left at 5:15. Got there and Ms. Peggy or something told us what to do since it was our first communion, haha. Regular mass, but it felt long. And, yeaaaah. Got First Eucharist, then took pictures with the Priest and family after the mass. Then my grandparents were planning on treating all of us out to Chilli's, but fucking Auntie Bim wanted to go to Red Robin, so we went there but the wait was 'too long for her' so we went to Todai. HELLA EXPENSIVE, i feel bad for my gramma, shit. Ate a lot, I GOT HELLA FAT. This weekend was a fattening weekend for me. Wooopsies. Talked to Mikayla a little, then went home. Took a shower, opened out gift. And yeah.

LONG WEEKEND! But it was good getting First Communion and mostly seeing MACARAEGS<3(:

Aft.- Dance.

Yet, another long day, it was alright.

Mmm, nothing new during school. After school was the dance. Uh, it was kinda boring, but I guess it was okay. Ate Dippin' Dots with Adrianna (: ILY. Hung out with her, Martha, Amy, Angela, Diana, Eller, William, Bryce and others. Didn't dance that much, just talked and yeah. Got a picture with NIKKI =) imy. +FREAK! Haha, looooveyou. Mm, stood around most of the time. Barely any people there. DJ was okay, but really i didn't pay attention. Last dance with William, and yeah. Stupid Amy, Adrianna, Karisza, and Martha. HAH, i love you guys. Dorkbutts. Then went home. Took a nap. Woke up, ate pizza. Went to the garage to see what everyone was doing. Putting together the flower vases. Took videos dancing and singing with Julianna. HA ;D I'll put them up later. Mm. Now she's doing karaoke, and I'm just watching her.

OHMAN, tomorrow's the big daaaaay. I can't belive it came so fast (: I'm nervous, but I'm excited too ;] Gonna see ANJELICA, +KEZ & ALAYSIA. Haven't talked to the in a while.

Replaced again ''/. I always see you with _________. Mmm, idk. &sorry.

Builds up.

STRESSSS! Today was a long day.

First Period- Same boring choir, nothing new.
Second period- Played soccer. Lost 0-9. HA, we're cool.
Break-Comfort my girrrrrl. ily.
Third period- Took notes, +almost fell asleep.
Fourth period- Talked about homework. Eller came in. ahah.
Lunch- Talk with Angela, Eller, Bryce, and more. Adrianna's funnay. 'CALL HER A BITCH'. Dork.
Fifth period- Uh.
Sixth period- ^
Track- pictures. HAHA, it was fun/boring. Funny stuff happened, haha. Good times.
After- Went home to pick up Austin, then went to Creek to get Aaron the OSH to get supplies for his project. He didn't find anything, so we went to the church rehearsal for grandparents' golden. Saw Sydney, Joshua, Christie, Aunts, Uncles, VINNIEEEE(: It was fun. Messed around while the parents talked and planned it. Vinnie's a cuuuutie. Love him. Then did a run through. Walk down the aisle, bow, sit, blabla. Saw Leslie! Then went to Denny's with everyone and ate. Austin and Joshua are annoying. Watched Joshue and Sydney fight about DS's. Then watched Josh and Vinnie play Bakugon, or whatever that stuff is called. HAH, it's pretty coolio. But J tries to teach Vinnie things he doesn't even do. Ridiculous. Play games on Sydney's itouch, then finally ate. Went to Eastridge to get brothers' and dad's tuxedos. It took like an hour, hella long. Walked around while we waited, then went into the car with Aaron so i could start homework (which didn't work out) and blast music. It was scary, hella late. Finally got home around 9:30, rushed to do homework. Gonna take a shower sooooon.

Tomorrow's the dance (: I'm excited, but everyone says I'm boring. We'll see about that, but yeah. The weather's cooling down! That's gooooood, but i wanted to wear shorts tomorrow. Whatever.

Everyone's bitching at me and getting mad at me for little things, I just don't get it. So much homework. This has been a long week.Have to study for a test, then do a project that's due Monday. I'm busy alllll weekend, 50th then communion, no time to chillll. Oh man. fml.

MIA.

Why is everyone mad at me? :O. +Nobody tells me anything anymore. Left out =/ bla. There's so much i need to catch up on. FUUUUUUH.

Today was okay. Same-o stuff.

First period- Choir, boring stuff. Ihateit. Oge messed up hella. HAH, but it's coooos. Nothing really happens in that class. I'M SORRY BARRY! I'll make it up to you. Promisepromise. Went to assembly, it was okay I guess. Basketballl, haha that guy is doooope! Butbut, I think it was stupid, actually.
Break- TIFFANY CAME BACK! I missed youuuu. Hung out with Best Friend, Amy, Martha, Adrianna, Diana, Tiffany, Sarah, and them. Talked about stuff, and yeah.
Second period- I hate PE! Soccer stinks, forreals. Played a game, i think we lost. I suck at soccer. So so so so so so so so so so badly. I hate this hot weather D:
Third period- Spence's classss, toook notes. I think? I don't really remember. HA.
Fourth period- Sandoval just talked and yeah I don't remember what happened there either.
Lunch- Hung out with Angelaaaaa. Haven't hung out with her in a while. It's good to catch up w/ you once in a while =). Walked around, went to the basketball court. Talked to people here and there. Talked to beeest and Jayleen for a little, watched them sell tickets. Haha, and yeah.
Fifth period- Talked about Earth Day. SO DAMN BORING. Dayum. Then watched a video. JC and Tiffany threw a paper ball at me. Thanks. I needed that. AHAH.
Sixth period- Some packet thaaang. JC kicked my chair, as usual. Diana was quiet, as usual.
After- Went to grandma's house. Messed around with brother and cousin, it was fun. But they got annoying. Kept on playing with fans and being buttfaces, so yeah. Then went home, the end.

Boooooring day.


IMY Huynh (:<3

Adventure

Yesterday, I ran around the block a few times with Auntie, Austin, and the beezy. Then went to that big tree and found a swing, so we stayed there for a little. Messed around with the big rock for a little. It's peeling. ha.

Today went around the block again. Went to grandparents' house and played ball. Lifted weights. HA. Came back home and went to the tree again. Some girls kicked us out, wtf ? >:O Oh well. It was fun. That's it, I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA GET FAT. ha.

Starter

Yesterday, went to Oakridge and met up with Nikki. Watched Hannah Montana, ha, it was cute (: The little brat had to tag along, it got annoying. But it's ohkay. Caught up with Nikki! Talked a lot, and yeah.

Today, my cousin, auntie, and me are going running around the block (: I need exercise, since yeah. Haha, shit dude I'm scared.

Here we go again, you thinking you're the shit, doing all this stuff that YOU think will impress people. Thanks to Eller, you're lucky you've had more than one chance, I mean it. And I'm not about to give out more chances again.

Partyyyy

Another party, Joshua's 8th. I think? Mm, big boy now (: Kristine came over, picked up Tristan, then went to Dave and Busters for his party. Ate, took a long time for the waiter to get our food! Dang, that pasta wasn't filling at ALL. Watched the kids, played games. Then Sydney, Aaron, Tristan, and Kristine went into the mall so I played more games with Julianna and Austin. Ha, fun. Got lots of candy (: It was fuuuunish. ISH.


*Tomorrow, hanging out with NIKKI! Gonna be fun, imy. (:

People these days

Piss me off. Act like I don't exist. Act all hype when they aren't, or like someone who they're not. Idk, people need to stay tamed, calm the fuck down, too. -_-

I N S O M N I A

I'll stay up til' you're next to me.

Happy Easter kiiiiiddos. Party today. BORING, i blew up balloons, set up in the backyard. Egg Hunt, guess who came? =) Mm, to my surprise. You probably got me in trouble. Ha, it's fine i guess. Talked to Sydney, and that's about it. WOAH, who knew all my cousins had BOYFRIENDS?! Hmm, lots of new stuff today, man. Nobody tells me stuff anymore. Hung out in guest room, but Julianna kept talking smack about me, so I left. And, yeah. Nothing new really, I guess. Julianna, you're annoying. Doing the exact opposite of what i tell you? -_- Dumb broad. Du ma, #$#@!

Honestlyyy,

I dislike how you say you want to change, but continue to do what you've been doing. But whatever. Bla.

Didn't get any sleep last night, so I didn't exactly 'wake up' at any certain time. Stayed around the house, did chores, hung out with family, played gameeees. Went to L & L, some Egg Roll place to order food. I had Masubi for the first time in like, foreverrr. Mmm, tastes good. Love it. Then Walgreen's, and Safeway to get stuff for Aaron and Austin's party tomorrow. Gonna be fun, i guess. Get to see the cousins, it's been a long time. Ish. They COULD be fun sometimes, no, actually. Not really. Going out for dinner later, maybe. Not sure yet.

-Let's make plans, si? (: This break is so plain.
Sunday: Partyyy.
Monday: Valley Fair/Oakridge.
Tuesday: ?!
Wednesday: CGA, maybe?
Thursday-Sunday: Nada. Telll me if you want to make plans, yeaaaaah.

JERK! It's fun. Hah.

FML.

I don't think there's a point in blogging if I'm going to continue to blog about the exact same thing day after day after day. But, idk. Can't help myself, it's killing me inside to know that we aren't friends anymore. Without you, I'm nothing. I can't even think straight without knowing whether you still love me or not. I want to apologize, but when you think about it; there's nothing to apologize for, unless i do one thing. I don't know how to apologize, what am I supposed to say. I treated you wrong, I know. I fucked up, i know. I'm a bitch, i know. Idek anymore. Look, i love you. It was hard for me to lose you, I have no clue how I'm going to live my life without you, but I'll try. For sure, i can get myself into shit. The thing is i don't know how to get out. But anyways.

Today, went to gramma's house. Cousins came over, we didn't even talk. Tfuck is up with that. Did homework, took a long nap. Bla.

I'm done

I'm officially missing you

I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry i'm sorry.

I know you don't look at my blog, and you know who you are. I hate how we always fight, but you know i can't live without you, I've tried, and obviously I don't last that long. I've told you before, i love you so much. More than you think, I'm sorry if I don't show it. I don't know what i was thinking, but it just so happened to end up like this. I hate our little fights, cause they always turn into big ones. I meant it when i said 'forever'. But now, I know you don't believe me anymore. So this is it. I guess. I love you.

''Even if we fight a million times over little things, we could still make it better"

"I'll ask the sun to shine away"

Sure enough, it did. Far, FAR away. Not such a good day, but it was okay i guess. On the +side, talked to Nikki ♥, so many huuugs. MADE MY DAY! =)

Happy Birthday

Brooooother. Aaron. You're old. Fifteen years, you could get a job now ;D And next year you get a car! :O Drive me everywhere i want to go [: I hoooope you had a good one today. And. LOOOOOK AT THESE BABIES RIGHT HERE.
<--, Five more days, and these are all yours :P It's not THAT long of a wait. [: I LOVE YOU BROTHER. Even though you boss me around and is a big meanie had to me sometimes. :P



Today. Mm, it was alright. Still feel the same way I felt yesterday, but now that you at least know how I feel, I'm feeling less insecure. I can see that you're still doing that stuff, but, heeey, i guess It's just your nature to do that.. I thought that after I talked to you would change, a bit, i guess not. I GUESS, that's all I see, that's what i think, THINK.

School was normal.
First period: Same booooringass Choir.
Second period: Ran the mile :O With JC, since Joyce had to ditch me to take pictures. That fatass thought i couldn't keep up. Muaha, WHAT NOW FOOL :P Got a 9:18, SO SHLOOOW. After, watched Valerie play basketball (: She's cute, i love her. The weather kept changing, HOT AND THEN COLD. Valerie is HELLA GOOD and thinking of songs about the weather. :P She's so cool, she has shutter shades made out of pipe cleaners. OOHWEE. Diana gave me chocolate after i ran :D So i ate it like a fucking savage. RAAAAWR.
Break: Nada.
Third period: Spence's test. Talked to Bryce a little, Blabla.
Fourth period: GOD, i hate Sandoval's class. There's like, nooobody to talk to -_- Except Adrienne, but she's all the way in the back at the TA desk. Mm. I almost fell asleep, so boring. Eller came in!(: And, yeah.
Lunch: It was cold. Hung out with Amy, talk to her. I love you smore. So much. Seven more days until two months. *MUAH, i love you.
Fifth period: Bawa's class, same thing we do every day. Take notes.
Sixth period: NOTHING. All we did was work in our Interactive Readers, mm. So boring.
After school: TRACK. Hung out with Thy and recorded the girls' events. It was SUPER DUUUUPER cold. You don't even know. Talked to stinky girl and Martha and #6 and Dum dum and Dumb Broad and Best Friend a little :P Mmm. Went home. Homework. BLA. Wii Sports & Wii Fit is so much fun =) I loooobe it. Ha.

*Oh boooy, what will he say!?

-

Typical Weekend. Went so Sydney's Saturday. Mall and church Sunday.

I said what I really meant. When i hear your name, all that pops into my head is "?". Should I like you? Should i let go? Do i say yes? Or no? Hm.

Brother's birthday coming up in two days, I got his gift. HA. You should be happy. Mm, his party/Austin's Party/Easter Party/Family get together coming up the 12th. Should be fun. I guess.

Mmm.

I'm craving frozen yooogurt, my favorite! =) Annnnyways, this past week has been good. Track manager. It's fun with Nikki, Helena, Thy, Katerina, Kylee, and more. I got a sunburn on my face ]: Oh well, bla.

-OKAY, you again. I was fine with you at firrrrst, but now my BROTHER? O_o i mean, come on be real now. You copy people too much, find your own fucking swag. Please, thanks. I'd appreciate it. Cause it seems like that's all you do, you can't seem to do things on your own. And cheating on stuff, making up notes to get yourself out of shit, how am i supposed to trust you when I know that you do that kind of stuff. OMN.